This summer, I paid attention.
The first three summers here had been full of preoccupation.
They were full of uncertainty, waiting, stress, and striving. Job hunts, moves, and surgeries.
The summers here are hot and humid, and I would just endure and sweat through them. Anxiously waiting to get through the current stressor in front of me.
Sunmer is usually my least favorite season anyway. I prefer clouds and shade to the bright bright sun and fall temps to the hot ones.
But this year I decided to pay attention.
To the heat. To the sun. To the storms and the rain.
I didn’t have to job hunt, didn’t have to move, and didn’t need a surgery.
To my delight, though there were weeks where the heat was truly oppressive, it generally didn’t kill me. I actually didn’t sweat as much as I had in recent memory. I’m just not a big fan of sweating you guys, lol.
The summer storms that I love came. I didn’t notice too many weeks where we went without any rain. Maybe a couple. And we’ve gotten two really nice reprieves from the heat with big dips in the temps. One week it hit the low 80s for a few days, and today the high is 74, with temps in the low 80s for the next two days again. Oh, rejoice!
This is all very good news to me. As an HSP - a high sensitivity person - meaning, someone with a highly sensitive nervous system, who doesn’t like lots of bright light, noise, or very cold temps either for that matter - the physical things really matter to me. Yes, I’m kind of obsessed with the weather.
But it wasn’t just the weather that made this summer better. Since I wasn’t so preoccupied with stressful life things, I made a conscious effort to do some things that had been on my bucket list.
I visited the mountains in Western NC, and they were beautiful. I went paddle boarding and got acquainted with lake life like I’d been dreaming. It wasn’t much, but I was intentional and I did things - things that mattered to me. I should have done it sooner, but last week after work I sat on my balcony watching the storms rolling in over me, watching the rain start to fall.
One thing that really sunk in with me this summer is that I really love being outside. I love the feeling of natural air on my skin most of all.
(So you’d think I’d love summer, but that heat and bright sun really make it impossible a lot of days! Especially for this fair, skin cancer surviving girl).
I’ve realized that I want to prioritize being outside much more often. Not necessarily doing things (I’m not really the active type), but simply sitting and being outside. I want to make a point of sitting outside this fall, in my more beloved chilly temps, even if it’s with blankets around me. I think I’m going to buy a fire pit and make that a big thing most nights.
And before I knew it, summer started coming to an end, whereas I usually have to bemoan the slow crawl to fall that never goes as quickly as I wish it would.
This year, summer was kind to me, and I decided that summer can be my friend.